I feel a cold strip on my side as Soil Parent wakes and pulls her arm back into the water. Since Pack Guider’s^ Placement, she sleeps on a rock shelf just below the waterline where I access the den. She has never slept alone. I understand how that feels. She has never slept alone. I understand how that feels. Where she used to be awake for degrees, sleep for 40 cents then keep going, she sleeps every degree for a littersworth of cents. She starts awake several times in the longer sleeps of a day and grasps me with her, often too dry, arm. Nearly everything I would do to comfort a fellow dog is not helpful to her. I do regularly groom her air-arm. She seems to find it soothing. Every other octopus seemed to have groomed their grief from their arms once they left the sensory pools, and life seems to have continued. Not for Soil Parent. She is experiencing a loss of Pack that no octopus seems able to understand.
The otters denned together separately, so I am able to gently slip into the water to join Soil Parent. She has a big night tonight and I want her to be the least aware she can be that she needs to do that alone. She has explained the ceremony to me (octopus seem absolutely full of ceremonies!). Before the Cove Suitor’s Fayre she is neither Heir nor Mother, between the Placement and the Suitor’s Fayre, a no-longer-Heir-not-yet-Mother is expected to add to her garden which gives the family a chance to see what kind of Mother she will be. This night, eight 8-nights from the Placement, is the night when she will make her additions.
It is also the night when the Suitor’s caverns are cleared for the new Suitors to decorate. Pack Guider’s Suitors are welcome to stay living in Cove or to return to their original Family-waters and Families (when they were still here to return to). Cove-River Suitor has said he wants to return to the life in fresh, churning water but Cove-Cold Suitor wants to stay in Cove and become a knowledge-seeker. I am not sure what the others think yet because they have been less in Soil Parent’s company (and thus mine). Eight 8-nights is the amount of time allotted to those closest to a Mother (her Heir, Lorekeeper and Suitors) to prepare for the change to facilitate the new Mother. Tonight, is the beginning of the new maternship of the Family.
Soil Parent seems to have no appetite and I ate well last Rise.
« Do you want to go? There is no need to delay. Lorekeeper Runt^ Stubs will meet us there. I know that Mauve Gardener is prepared to meet you from last-prism. »
« Yes, I am ready to do this. » She sounds more herself. I guess this is the mourning period for a reason. She siphons to the exit and I paddle with her. Since the patch addressed my buoyancy, I find swimming all night much less tiring and I spend less time fighting against my own body. I also seem to need to breathe even less frequently, maybe the patch improved my lungs again. Once we are out into Cove, she syphons and swirls, she swims towards the surface, spreads her arms wide and floats down like a seed in the wind. She has not moved so freely in nine 8-nights, it is wonderful to experience.
« I think I might be able to enjoy being Mother. » She sounds cheeky, the tone she uses when she thinks about Lorekeeper Runt Stubs and making him dark. Profound defiance masked in gentle teasing. I stretch my creative swimming muscles and feel the joy of travelling fast, bombarded with information and not stopping to understand anything. We are rolling round each other, when another octopus joins us. Mauve Gardener seems relieved to be able to enjoy himself tonight. The three of us swirl our way to the Suitor’s caves.
They are set into the cliff face on the murkiest/Rise heading from the Matriarchal chamber. They are varied in size and aspect and angle. When a new Suitor is selected, he may choose from any of the available caves and make it his own. His aim is to create an environment that the Mother would like to visit and might find as a pleasant location for a tangle^. I still don’t understand how that works but it seems to be most of the Suitor’s job, inducing tangles in any way they can. From what I do understand, this is like Heat, but not Heat. When a Mother starts her duty of making new octopups from her body, seems to be a separate process but tangles are relevant to this somehow.
« Time to start then. » Soil Parent dashes to one cave and enters, I have never been within a Suitor Cave, I do not know who lives in which. I follow to the entrance and see and smell Cove-Warm Suitor, he is scraping algae from the walls, the water smells of plant anger. There are a small collection of items at the bottom of the cave, I can barely see them through the algae cloud, but I can smell an anemone, some small-kelp and one of the large shells that Pack Guider thought so beautiful. « Cove-Warm Suitor, how are you feeling? »
« Mourning is over. I am beginning to think about what I would like to do next. I might return to Warm waters and feed until I burst for an 8-night or two. It is strange, nearly every octopus I have missed tangling is not in The Tangle anymore so I am not sure what would be an enjoyable use of my time. I’ll probably be back. I want to see your first Suitor’s Fayre. You will be an excellent Mother. You are so caring I am sure you will keep most in your broods. »
« Thank you for your kind words. I think you deserve a feast or two and I would love to see you at the Suitor’s Fayre. What are you planning to do with your collection? »
« I am not really bothered. You know I’m not really attached to things like a Natal Cove. I was thinking of giving the anemone and small-kelp to » – gesture that could only mean Mauve Gardener – « I thought I would push the shell and the stones and stuff out over the cliff. Good luck to whatever finds them. »
« Are there any items that remind you particularly of Mother? »
« The anemone was what finally persuaded her to tangle with me an 8-turn ago. I had already, given my arm. We had never seen eye-to-eye and we all thought her choosing me was an inter-familial obligation rather than having seen anything in me. Warm Gardener » – big gesture – « cultivated this strain. We were in the same brood and close when we were growing up. She gave me it when we met at the Cove Suitor’s Fayre that cycle. I added it to my cave and, on the next visit, Cove Mother » – well-practised gesture – « stayed for much longer than usual. We chatted and ate for a night and eventually tangled with Open-Cove Suitor » – sensuous gesture – « and Cove Knowledge-seeker » – graceful gesture – « . She was an admirable and interesting Mother. »
« Then, may I take the anemone? I would like to take something from each of the Suitors on their last night and memorialise them in my garden. Every one of you has touched my life and I want to acknowledge your freedom to pursue your own pleasures. » At this, he flushes white.
« Of course you may. That is an idea even your Mother wouldn’t have had. » Mauve Gardener responds to Soil Parent’s chemical signal and enters.
« The anemone please. » He takes the anemone in one arm and asks,
« Would you mind if I took the small-kelp? It is a nicely kept patch and I hate to see that care be wasted. » He looks to Suitor and then Soil Parent showing white.
« It’s fine, I’m not used to it yet either. I am happy for you to and Cove-Warm Suitor » – tender gesture – « already told me that was his plan. » Mauve Gardener darts his arm forward and gently plucks each stem from the rocks. His arms chain them away. Once he has collected them all, he places an arm against Cove-Warm Suitor and they share some unknown moment before he leaves to ferry the plants to the Gardens. « Thank you for all the memories we have shared. » The water fills with their chemical-memories; discussing some delicacy I can’t understand but that he was excited she was experiencing; her first Suitor’s Fayre when she thought she would lose Pack Guider and dissolve her; a meeting that I can’t interpret but seems important in the octopus meeting chamber I cannot enter. Each is tinged with admiration and affection.
They wrap their arms round each other’s arms and gradually pull apart. Soil Parent heads to the next cave, seemingly at random exuding content. She enters. Cove-Reef Suitor is sitting in a mass of corals, he has filled every available rock with different shapes and colours. There are tiny thin shells full of glowing light. Like the sky-spots, this chamber is lit by tiny glowing specks. He sees her; his own speckles expand.
« What am I going to do? I know I have to be out tonight, and I have found another cave nearer the gardens. I can’t figure out how to transport these all. The new cave is a different shape, and the same planting won’t work. I have been awake all day trying to start. »
« We’ve got Cove Gardener » – her playful gesture for Mauve Gardener – « and some other Gardeners ready to help with moving tonight. If you instruct your new co-gardeners, I am sure you can get everything moved over with ease. I have come to ask you if any of your collection remind you particularly of my mother. »
« They all do. » He pauses and scans his collection, « She thought my interest in coral was charming, but she did not share it really. She was always happy to listen though (as you know) and we spent many nights discussing cultivation. Maybe the brain coral. No, the spiny coral, she always thought I was a fool for growing it in my cave. She preferred soft corals though. Oh, I don’t know. » His freckles have almost joined together making him dark brown rather than his usual brownish red. I am still struck by how much subtlety there can be in a colour that a cycle ago I had no idea existed.
« Then may I request that I take one of your bioluminescent shells? I have listened to many a lecture about coral in this chamber. And it is not like I could ever get comfortable. Mother always thought it hilarious that you were so eager for coral-space that you had to have tiny shells of light rather than coating your walls and having decent light to see your precious coral by. I am sure if you had been an earlier Suitor you would have had a collection twice the size! »
« Well my new cave is a little bigger in fact. I was going to do an algae wall. A bit more traditional perhaps but more suited to a Gardener than a Suitor. »
« I hope you manage to stick to that. It would be much easier to visit you if there was somewhere to rest while you catch me up on your coral projects. I look forward to seeing what you can achieve with full resources and space. I’ve asked Cove Gardener » – Playful gesture – « to find you a decent patch of shallow with good light to set up your coral nursery. It is important that your brood-Family’s legacy is remembered. » Mauve Gardener enters, « one of the glowing shells please. » He snaps the kelp-core high near the roof of the cave and passes it back through his arms.
« There are a few of us here to give you an arm when you are ready. We brought deep shells and rock bowls to transfer the delicate corals then we can strip the hardier stuff pretty quickly. Does that work for you? » Cove-Reef Suitor restores to his resting colour immediately, his skirts even show a hint of blue.
« Yes, that would be wonderful. Thank you. » Soil Parent runs an arm briefly over him and leaves. I head straight to the surface while she goes to the next cave. I want to get back down straight away. Octopus seem to have no Pack, but they have connections. When I understand them then I will fill the aching pit in my stomach that wishes for Pack. I feel Pack with Soil Parent and that is the strongest feeling I have ever had. I have good relationships with Mauve Gardener, Gentle Arms and of course Dark Provider. I also know some of the Suitors quite well but even where they know and have Pack with each other, there is no overall sense of Pack. We are not one unit.
I enter to hear her getting a response of what item reminds Cove-Open Suitor of Pack Guider. His cave is stripped bare already and his collection is tied into 8 bundles.
« I found it when out in the bay. Your Mother had shared a chemical memory with me a long while before, but the image was so vivid, that when I happened to see it glinting on the bed I dipped down and grabbed it. I don’t think she ever saw it. I took it for me, I never had it on display. » He is holding and, I think, charging a shell. Soil Parent accepts it with reverence.
« Cove Lorekeeper » – she inflates herself and turns dark – « is going to be extra dark when I show him this! » Soil Parent is swishing. « Not only am I making my first addition in such clear terms but there will be two of » – sad small gesture - « ’s shells in my Garden. »
« When is Cove Lorekeeper » – somehow ruder but similar gesture to Soil Parent’s – « not dark? I think your mother becoming Mother so young left him dark from the off. I hope he finds a way to lighten somenight. » I am fascinated by these interactions. I am not the only one who finds Lorekeeper Runt Stubs grumpy all the time.
« Anyway, I will be off for a tour. I am going to stash my remaining collection and be back by Cove Suitor’s Fayre. I think I might like to do some knowledge-seeking. I am intrigued about what these other species are doing on Peak^. It would be interesting to see what they get up to. That’s down to you, » – his affectionate gesture for me – « . You are an interesting character, think of all the friendships we are missing by just giving Peak over to the Peak-animals and not trying to blend our cultures. » I swell with pride. I have inspired an octopus to go and find what they think of Pack. I am making Pack in a bigger way. I am in the right place at the right time to help every creature to realise they can be Pack. He puts his arm out and rests his suckers on my nose.
(You and she are the future of The Tangle. Make the most of her, Mothers are always gone too soon. ) I have never had such precise physical communication before. I barely even try to use it in the main. The translator, now permanently slung round me like a cache-pouch, renders trying to communicate as they do redundant. I try to reply.
(I will. ) I must have a go at using the more precise communication again soon.
I’ve seen such a range of different caves showing the unique interests of each of their occupants. Each had an item for Soil Parent’s garden and a chemical-memory or two. As I have watched her listening intently to stories and memories that, in the main, she witnessed when they happened, I realised how good a Pack Guider she would be. Many of them were surprised when she told them her plan, but most seemed proud or pleased or delighted by it. Our current visit is to the only Cove-Chasm Suitor, who was so eager to leave his chamber was totally bare, with no sign of there ever having been any ornamentation. He has nothing for Soil Parent to add to the garden. She asks him if there is anything he would like.
« I will not help you desecrate the Gardens. The direction your Mother was, and you are now, taking is not octopus. I am going to return to Chasm and have some seclusion with those who understand the traditional way. I will become a gardener or a knowledge-seeker and have a peaceful life out of the bright swirling waters. Nerite! » He leaves in a cloud of disgust and a chemical-memory of Pack Guider’s pride in tiny Soil Parent placing the hermit last-shell into her garden. Soil Parent sheds the disdain and swirls out into Cove. Mauve Gardener is waiting for the item for the garden, but she doesn’t explain. He approaches me.
« He doesn’t have anything for the Garden. He was rude to her. But he is gone now. »
« Good. He has never been a pleasant character and he makes Lorekeeper » – funnily grotesque version of big and dark – « look like a happy orange starfish^. He can return to Chasm and bother them with his opinions on the domestication of zebra fish. Ugh! Why Cove Mother » – affectionate gesture – « picked him I will never know. »
Soil Parent swoops back and to the next cave rippling colours. She is exhilarated and free. It is beautiful to experience her in this way. I had almost forgotten how much fun we have. The three of us happily continue our visits.
We have visited them all! We collected items for each Suitor (except Chasm Rude). Cove-Reef Gardener-Suitor is now fussing over the removal of the hardy corals. Mauve Gardener has taken the collection to the garden and now is time for Soil Parent to place everything.
« Well let’s see if we can make Cove Lorekeeper » – big and dark – « ink himself when I tell him my plan. » She says to us both impishly. The three of us, almost a Pack, race together to the gardens. Even though I am in First Eyes, the octopus both get far ahead of me. I remind myself this isn’t Pack, and they don’t know how to move as a Pack when Soil Parent stops dead. They both turn and wait for me to join them.